Striking a balance

My little world had been changing recently.  We had the big move to Cornwall back in December and that was a lot of upheaval but the good kind. Mr Green has his new job  which has already expanded and the children have their new schools and nursery.  I have a new part time job in which I get to indulge my foodie passion and experiment with new recipes.  I have the blog which is slowly coming together (I now have some pictures,  woohoo!) And I have my felting.  I have taken the plunge and launched a facebook page and etsy shop which feels both scary but exciting.  I am networking and trying to be proactive.  And finally,  we have a new addition to the family,  a gorgeous baby boy. Ok, no I haven't had a secret pregnancy - he is a gorgeous little kitten who is a furry bundle of love and mischief.  He is already enriching our lives and improving my mental health.  However,  it's very hard to get things done in between cuddles and playtime.

 

So, although things are going in the right direction I still feel a little like a headless chicken.  I seem to have lost the ability to prioritise and sequence.  It is tempting to keep checking page views on my blog, tweaking my layout, check likes on the facebook page or activity in the etsy shop or editing my listings. And it is tempting to keep cuddling the kitten. 

The house is a mess, Sausage is watching too much tv, we are going to bed too late and I'm not devoting enough time to actually making things.  I need to get organised and feel that I almost need a military precision schedule in order to accomplish all my daily tasks from the mundane to the more exciting.  I have a lot of balls in the air and I don't want to drop any. So I need to become more organised and productive and stop procrastinating.

It would be wonderful to hear tips and advice from my readers if you have any gems of wisdom.  Right,  I'm going to put down my phone and the kitten and start on my jobs. Maybe I'll just make a cuppa first...;-).

Running to stand still

I am busy! It has been over a week since my last post and I have things I should be doing right now instead of writing this.  It feels strange however not to write now I have become used to regularly airing my thoughts to the world (or the small corner of it that reads my blog).  When I first started blogging I was always nervous about hitting the publish button and it has taken a while to find my voice.  I am still a newbie and have a lot to learn but it feels more natural now.

I have had lots of drains on my time recently which have prevented me from writing.  I am always busy but can usually carve out little pockets of time to write.  The last couple of weeks have been pretty hectic however.  I have been away (see this post ) which was fun but also quite emotional. It has taken time to process my reaction to the visit - more on that soon. On my return I had to catch up with all the things I hadn't been around to do (although Mr Green did a great job while I was away). Since then I have had a poorly Apple home from school,  which was tricky because it coincided with Sausage's non nursery days and we had to contend with being stuck in the house for three days solid. Needless to say we all went a bit stir-crazy! Thankfully Apple is now better but Sausage is unwell. Oh the joys of sibling virus sharing!

On a productive note, I have a job! I am currently 'between careers' and trying to really think carefully what I might want to do when Sausage starts school.  Idle pondering does not pay the bills though so I have found a local part time job that fits into nursery days.  It will be busy and at times hectic as the job is a tearoom supervisor and we live by the sea! It is far removed from my previous career jobs but it is only a temporary measure to bring in some pennies.  Hopefully I will feel more useful and start to meet more people. I have already been asked to contribute some recipes to the menu so I will post some on here soon too.  I will continue to create things and attend craft fairs and hopefully improve my skills. I still feel tempted to pop back into education for a while too...

I have been busy preparing for a recent craft fair which I attended but didn't sell much. I am inspired to continue though having received some lovely feedback and some bespoke orders. I can be so self critical and really struggle to believe that I have any talents,  but when people want to buy my work it gives me a spark of hope that maybe my work is desirable.  Maybe my little hobby could turn into something more. I recently read a blog post that highlighted the battle between having big dreams and the regular bouts of self doubt. I will try to maintain a positive outlook.

Among all these things are the mundane realities of laundry,  cleaning, cooking,  admin, dog walking etc. And these jobs mount and grow when you add children into the mix. So, I started this post feeling that I was on a constant treadmill or running around aimlessly,  trying so hard to do everything that nothing was getting done. Clearly I was mistaken as reading through I see I have achieved things and will keep marching on. I must now return to my domestic drudgery after attending my poorly boy who is stirring from slumber.  In the meantime,  why not let me know what's going on in your lives x

Let it flow

I have always been a creative person but have often struggled to find the right outlet.  At school I loved English and Art and did very well in those subjects. When it came to choosing A levels I found it really hard because I wanted to pursue a science career but didn't want to let go of the Arts. Let go I did however as there wasn't space to fit in these other subjects and it wasn't seen as appropriate to mix the two disciplines.  

As I embarked on my studies through college and University I took delight in making careful drawings of cells, insects and fungi,  but that was the only drawing I did (apart from illustrating the letters I sent home). I continued to read novels but missed discussing them. Science was great though and I had no regrets.

Fast forward several (ahem) years and I find myself between careers. I have worked in science and healthcare and then decided to take time out to look after the children.  Over the last couple of years I have been feeling increasingly creative.  I have tried several things including starting a novel, blogging, making novelty cakes,  bento lunches,  loom bands (!), weaving and felting.  I have found a love for felting and really enjoy the magical process of turning a pile of fluffy wool into a beautiful creation. I am self taught and have recently taken the step of trying to sell my work at craft fairs. I have had a lot of positive feedback about my work and it's great.  I have struggled with perfectionism and low self esteem all my life and it took a lot for me to show my work in public.  The fact that people have bought things and ordered things has given me some positive affirmation.

 

I love the creative process and would continue regardless of possible sales. But I can't help dreaming and wondering whether I could turn my hobby into something more. And, furthermore,  what direction should my career head in next? Do I return to health / science,  or try something new? I have learned a lot about myself during this hiatus and I fully admit that I don't cope well with 9-5, 5 days a week and I do bring work worries home and take on board a lot emotionally. I also need to be around for the children. I will need to work when Sausage starts school as we need the money and I need to do something meaningful. But I need to fit in work around the family. I do genuinely experience a sense of flow and positive energy when creating, so it would be wonderful if I could incorporate this into a career.  Who knows what the future will hold. I'm ready for a new challenge.  Who's with me...?

Smile and the world smiles with you..

I still seem to be grumpy today,  partly due to cabin fever with a house full of fluey children and partly due to sleep deprivation,  as well as the January slump. I have lost my mojo and extreme inertia has set in. But, slowly throughout the day my energy levels have increased, I have dispensed calpol and cuddles and improved the state of the house along with Mr Green.  Despite being a bit scared of the dark I took the dog out so Mr Green didn't have to. I started thinking about my January strategy and life in general. I am saddened every day by the bad things that happen in the world. I am always counting my blessings and appreciate my lot in life. I would like to do more to help others,  but don't always know what I can do. But I always try to be kind and compassionate. Although it is a small thing, I always try to smile at people and be polite and courteous.  I teach my children these values too. I am far from perfect but feel so much better about the world when I know I have done my best. When I have smiled at people in the street,  offered my assistance to those who may need it, thanked the shop assistant, sent a friend a good luck message.  Maybe if everyone smiled more and were a little less selfish there would be fewer bad things happening.  Smile,  give, hug, help, forgive, live. Make the most of the life you get and take opportunities.  Get off your bum and do something useful ;-).